Whales and Tumblr
i scrolled down for an explanation and there was none
you dont need one
If this post surpasses 100k notes I will get a frame from one of these gifs printed out on a 20”+ poster and hang it up in my living room
i saw a place called gamestop today. finally someone is stopping games
McDonald’s has been forced to open its first ever restaurant with a turquoise coloured sign after city planners said the signature yellow sign would be too garish. Officials in Sedona, Arizona told the fast-food giant they were unable to open a restaurant with the trademark yellow logo.This is due to the city’s strict regulations which prevent buildings from ruining the picturesque view of the desert.
Photo credit: Michael Wright/WENN.com
arizona joins the aesthetic movement
Ph. Lobke Leijser
I DIDNT UNDERSTAND THAT SHE WAS WEARING A SWEATER WITH WHITE SLEEVES I ONLY SAW THE BLACK AND GOT REALLY SCARED BECAUSE I THOUGHT SHE HAD FREAKISHLY SKINNY SLENDERMAN ARMS OH GOD
I THOUGHT IT WAS A GIGANTIC CAT!
Ok fun talks.
I got fired from my job. So that’s a first.
The how/why? For an innocent mistake. But it’s something I learned from.
Basically on Wednesday I tweeted that I thought it was cool that the company I worked for gave away free drugs.
Which essentially broke the NDA. And so they had to terminate me. Apparently they felt bad because it’s such an innocuous tweet but it still violated the NDA.
(Even though I googled what I tweeted and that info is available)
So I’m an idiot but I can learn from this and so can you. Because now I can be that reference “I know someone who broke an NDA and got fired”
1. Lockdown your shit as soon as you get hired. Specifically something like Twitter. I’ve always thought of myself as conscience of my social media presence. My Twitter isn’t my real name, it’s not connected to anything but since I used the company name they found me. I mean I didn’t tag them but any words used in a public tweet can be tracked.
Mine is on lockdown now but that’s a little too late.
2. Don’t use company name in anything. Only way they found my Twitter was because of that.
3. Seriously, really watch what you say online. It can have huge consequences. And I don’t want what happened to me to happen to you.
the funny thing about dril posts is that they actually do have a structure to them– they hit a kind of conceptual caesura halfway through, a point where there’s no inevitable logical connection between what’s been said and what’s still to come. here, the first sentence didn’t need to result in the second, yet it’s not “lol random” either; the speaker is angry about his boss’ draconian ferret-kissing policy, and reacts in kind, and even the reference to a “screen saver” reminds us that we’re in an office. it’s a narrative progression that, despite having an internal logic, alienates its punchline from its setup. who the hell is this person?
one thing i love about @dril posts is how they all seem to take place in a universe that is somewhat like our own, but with the habitus of white middle america taken to a bizarre, absurd, but strangely logical conclusion. take this one, for instance:
so we have our setting: a security guard protecting the american flag in the betsy ross museum, something almost archetypically american and middle class. but once again the first part, or setup, for the punchline, “fucking the flag,” careens the joke into an alien punchline that still, given the setting, makes sense. @dril’s security guard character imitates a sort-of cop-talk, the banter of a security guard, “buddy, they wont even let me fuck it”. you can imagine a similar response from a guard at any museum, but we’re talking about Fucking the American Flag, here.
i really love @dril.
it’s astonishing that a human being thinks of those posts. some person, someone out there whose existence we have to infer, because all we know is that those posts occur and they must be coming from somewhere. “the @dril tweeter” resonates as “the beowulf poet” does, except beowulf (which i’ve only read in translation, so i’m not an authority) has never made any use of the english language as baffling and sublime and somehow primally interlaced with the stuff of human consciousness as “IF THE ZOO BANS ME FOR HOLLERING AT THE ANIMALS I WILL FACE GOD AND WALK BACKWARDS INTO HELL.”
This is my favorite post, I am so glad I found it again.